Fool's Holiday
by WastefulReverie
Summary: When Jack runs out of gift ideas, he turns to an unlikely foe for help.


Jack hated holiday shopping. No, shopping was the easy part. He hated _deciding_ what to buy for someone, especially when his wife and children claimed all the good ideas. By the time he'd decided to buy Danny a new telescope, Maddie had already ordered one. When Jazz dropped some hints she'd like some new psychology textbooks, Danny'd already hit the bookstore with the last of his allowance. Don't even get him started on Maddie's gifts—they'd been married eighteen years and he almost always came up with the _worst_ gifts. He was lucky that she loved them anyway, grateful despite his blunders.

This year, Jack managed to come up with suitable gifts for her and Danny, but he was at a loss for Jazz. What did seventeen-year-old girls even like? Lip gloss? Unicorn stickers? Light-up sneakers?

That didn't sound right. Even when she'd been younger, Jazz was never into that stuff. He could always buy her a gift card, but that felt impersonal. Besides, he'd bought real gifts for Maddie and Danny! He should be able to find a gift for his daughter—it's not like she was a stranger!

With no other ideas, Jack started a list of things that Jazz liked. She liked psychology, school, and reading. Danny had already gotten her books, so he couldn't steal that idea. So what did like besides academics? Did Jazz do anything else besides study? He couldn't even name any TV shows she liked!

_Think Jack, think._

What about… a scarf? No, Jazz had plenty of scarves. Besides, Maddie had already bought her clothes.

What about a new phone case? Oh, but she already loved the one she had.

A set of bath products? Wait, that's what he got her last year. He didn't want to repeat himself—that was just pathetic.

What does she _like_?

Jazz loved her Mom's cooking. She liked going on car rides. She liked watching over her brother and she _didn't _like her parents' inventions. She liked reading the newspaper, but not magazines. Lately, Jazz had gotten into scrapbooking, but she already had about every material on the planet. Jack remembered when she got into that hobby, Maddie had sworn up and down that it was beyond ridiculous. Neither of them could understand why Jazz idolized Amity Park's notorious ghost kid, Phantom. She liked him as much as she liked scrapbooking and neither of them knew why.

Although… maybe Jack _could_ get her something for her scrapbook.

Sure, he didn't exactly approve of Jazz's—_ahem_—celebrity crush, but it was Christmas. Phantom didn't make it a secret that he liked signing autographs, hell, at one point he charged for them! If Jazz liked Phantom, then she'd love his signature, wouldn't she? It was the perfect gift!

The only problem was convincing Phantom that he wouldn't shoot him on sight.

* * *

It'd taken four days, but Jack finally managed to track the ghost boy down _and_ persuade him to stick around after a fight. The specter was sensibly reluctant, but he obliged Jack's requests.

"So uh, why the sudden change in trying to kill me? Feeling merry?"

Jack rolled his eyes. Was this kid always so sarcastic?

"You do autographs, right?"

Phantom blinked. "Yeah?"

Jack unzipped his fanny pack and pulled out a pad of paper. "Could you sign this?"

The ghost looked more taken aback than anything. "F—for you?"

"No. I mean, yes. But it's really for my daughter, Jazz. She's a huge fan of yours. I couldn't think of anything better to get her for Christmas."

"_Jazz_?" He sounded incredulous and Jack couldn't blame him. It wasn't every day that a ghost hunter asked a ghost to sign an autograph for his daughter. In fact, this was probably a first.

"That's her name."

"Right." Phantom accepted the pad of paper and one of Jack's pens. "What do you want me to write?"

"Just whatever you want, if that's okay."

"Yeah… alright."

He was kinda surprised that the ghost was going through with this. Although he took his sweet time writing a message to his daughter it wasn't too long or too short. That was good enough for Jack. The last thing he wanted was a ghost sounding _too_ chummy with his daughter, even if they'd never met.

Finally, the ghost handed the autograph back to Jack.

_Dear Jazz, I hope you have a Merry Christmas! You're my biggest fan and you always have my back. —Danny Phantom_

"Do you still charge?" he asked.

He knew that'd been a big deal a while back, that a ghost was charging real money for autographs. A few people had asked him why, and he'd claimed it was for 'medical supplies', which was bullshit since ghosts didn't _need_ medical supplies. Then again, Jack didn't want to be debted to a ghost. He'd rather pay cash now than expected to do something for Phantom later.

"Oh, no. No, it's Christmas. And you're_—_you're fine, Jack."

"Alright. Thanks."

He considered telling the ghost to watch his back, that their next meeting would be behind a loaded gun, but why should he warn him? If he could catch Phantom off-guard, then all the better, right?

"You're welcome."

The ghost beamed before he vanished into thin air. Jack couldn't help but feel that there was something familiar about that smile, but he couldn't place it.

* * *

Christmas morning started early. The entire family was awake by seven and Jack didn't know who was most excited_—_he or the kids. Once they all had a hearty breakfast, he and Danny claimed the couch, Jazz nestled into the loveseat, and Mads camped out on the floor. Both of his children practically chugged their cups of coffee before digging into their stockings.

Soon, it was time to start opening the big presents. Maddie started passing the gifts back to each family member and wrapping paper began to fly.

Jack got a new pair of pajamas and a HAZMAT suit from Maddie, a book on parascience from Jazz, and a tin of gourmet fudge from Danny. Mads also bought him a new pair of gloves for the lab and fixed some of his goggles. His sister sent him a new crockpot and his sister-in-law bought him a tie in case he wanted to get a 'real job'. Maddie insisted that she meant it ironically, but he knew better.

Additionally, he was surprised that Vladdie hadn't gotten him anything, considering that he bought gifts for the rest of the family, but beggars can't be choosers. Maybe Vlad was going to take him out sometime soon. That'd be fun, just like the good ol' days!

By the time Jazz got to Jack's gift, most of the presents had already been opened. He hoped she liked it. It was definitely an… unorthodox gift, to say the least.

She undid Jack's wrapping job_—_which was horrendous at best—and eyed Phantom's autograph. He could read her expression, but it wasn't as excited as he'd anticipated. No, no that was disappointment.

"Really, Danny? An _autograph_?"

Jack felt his stomach drop. She hated it. Oh God, _she hated it. _He should've just… just asked Mads what to get her. He was a shitty dad, wasn't he?

Jazz's eyes were still trained on Danny, who had a mad blush across his face. That was another reaction that didn't make a lick of sense.

"Jazz," his boy started.

"That's _my_ gift."

She seemed disbelieved. "What?"

"I uh, thought you liked Phantom?"

Jazz dropped the autograph. "I—I do—!"

"Jack, honey, are you saying _you_ got an autograph from the ghost boy?" Maddie intervened.

Oh boy, he forgot to tell Mads. This wasn't going to go down well.

"I knew that Jazzy liked him and that he liked giving autographs."

"You worked with the _enemy_."

"I mean, we didn't make any agreements or anything? It was really just an autograph, I'll get him next time! No ghost escapes Jack Fenton!"

"Do you _have _to go after him, though?" Danny spoke up. "It's not like he wants to hurt anyone, he's a good guy. He was completely cordial whenever you got the autograph, after all."

"Danno, he's still a ghost that wreaks havoc. No matter his intentions, he's still ectoscum."

"Say that to my face," Jazz challenged. "Tell me that he's evil and heartless after you went to him for this autograph. _Do it_."

She sounded angry. Oh boy, he didn't want this to turn into a fight. Especially on Christmas. He'd had nothing but good intentions, he didn't want it to turn out like _this_.

"Jazz, I respect your interests. But I'm a ghost hunter, first and foremost."

"That's not—"

"_Jazz._" Danny met his sister's eyes. "It's okay."

She bit her lip. "Alright."

What had just happened?

"Here, Danny," Maddie pulled out another gift from under the tree. "This one's from me."

Like that, everything snapped back to normal. Danny's face livened and he accepted the present with glee. "Thanks, Mom!"

None of them brought up Phantom for the rest of the day, even when Danny opened Jazz's gift—a black t-shirt with Phantom's logo. They just smiled and moved on, because it was Christmas. They might have different opinions when it came to the ghost boy, but that shouldn't tear them apart. They were _family_. Maybe one day the kids would realize that he was nothing more than a ghost, but until then Jack would respect their point of view.

Or maybe, just maybe, they'd prove him wrong. There was no telling the future, after all.

Once they'd cleaned up all the discarded wrapping paper, the four of them bundled in front of the TV and argued over which movie they should watch. The kids insisted on _Home Alone_, but was that _really_ a Christmas movie? A devilish kid left alone for the holidays, injuring burglars beyond belief. Maddie wanted to watch _Miracle on 34th_ _Street_, but she was alone in that endeavor—nobody else was particularly fond of black and white. Finally, they settled on _The Santa Clause, _where Tim Allen knocks Santa off a roof and becomes next in line to _be_ Santa.

They laughed a lot that night, between snacks. Jack shared some of his fudge with the family, and Maddie made sure to make popcorn. Jazz even pitched in with hot cocoa! This was what Christmas should be like every year. However, Jazz only had one year left before college. And if Danny passed all his classes (bless him) he'd have three.

His kids weren't going to be around forever, and that was okay. These moments, albeit fleeting, were enough to last a lifetime.


End file.
